leaveten's Diaryland
Diary
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panic!
i want to bookmark today because it's nothing special. just another day i wish i could say i'm going to change. my thoughts are so immature i'm writing this like i would in middle school, complaining about the ups and downs of broken hearts. i don't know why i feel like i should be closer to something but i can't figure out what i'm reaching for.
i'm one of those girls they write movies around, the ones that don't know what's good for them, always say they're done with assholes, always act like they deserve more. at the end of the day no one deserves anything. i need to erase that word from my vocabulary. you get what you demand from people, and if they don't want to give it to you you shouldn't sit and try to fight for it, you shouldn't hope karma gets them back, you shouldn't act like it was a waste. you should move on because in the end you're only hurting yourself.
i feel like it was about time for some self reflection, like i do every now and then and i thank god that i have this to write in so i can remember every place i ever went in my life. things i've learned from where i've been lately: never try to fit in where you don't, never try to please everyone by compromising yourself/your needs, never be around people who make you insecure, never hope for more than you know you're going to get because someone else will give it to you without the superstition, never appologize for what you didn't do wrong, never try harder for someone than they would for you, always know your worth and never compromise that because at the end of the day you really are all you'll have.
something i want to remember saying (yesterday): i am thankful for the problems that i have, because i can handle them and they're not any worse than they are. i am thankful for the person that i am because i'm lucky to be alive. and i'm never going to let myself be someone who doesn't believe this, never.
aneel
1:35 am - 08-13-11
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