leaveten's Diaryland Diary


five years in six paragraphs.

we still fight. we have those days. but at the end of each one, and throughout the whole thing it doesn't cross my mind that when I wake up the next day you'll still be a driving factor in my life, and I'm not scared because know that you're a permanent fixture, that you won't run away either.

I'm still excited, because every morning I know the first thing I look at is my phone and when I get that message that says "Good morning" from you I have butterflies. I still have butterflies. And I have them from no one else but you.

I can breathe easy knowing that whatever life throws at me, I face it with you. And the whole world can come crumbling down but that's okay because you'll hold my hand and somehow that will put all the pieces back together.

I can breathe easy knowing the bad days are not so bad days, that every day is at least, to some level, a good day because it's a day I get to have that one thing some people spend their whole lives looking for; it's a day I get to say I love you and mean it.

That's everything. I didn't grow up wanting a fairy tale. I don't have a love story in my head, I never wanted to be saved, and I didn't spend my time dreaming up romance. All I ever did was meet you and build own our little story. Without expectation or exaggeration, you made me and my life better.

I don't know what other people look for. I don't talk about the things between us, the way I melt because you have the most beautiful eyes, the way I remember everything about the first time you called me beautiful, the way when we have plans I count the minutes until I can see you, the way your smell is intoxicating to me, the things we do like how you give me kisses while I sleep and how I wake up each time but don't say a word. I don't talk about these things because they are ours. I don't know what other people think. Maybe they all assume I'm cold and that we don't have that grand sort of love. But we do, we have it, we have all of it and it's so special because it's yours and it's mine. We have it because of all the things I said, all the moments we remember, all the goosebumps I still get and all the things we still do. We have it, and we'll always have it. It's a blessing and an honor to grow into better people together, just me and you.

2:03 am - 05-18-15


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